Note: This post deals with a subject that people could find triggering.
“Tired” is the word I would use to describe how I feel about Batman v. Superman.
I’m glad that people liked the movie, or found things to like about it. More power to ya’.
I haven’t seen the movie yet. But reviews and analysis I’ve read confirm the impression I got from the trailers: The movie is grim.
Batman v. Superman is the kind of movie that makes me want to stop watching movies.
For almost two years now — ever since I dropped out of college — I’ve been struggling, on and off, with depression. Thinking “I squandered the one chance I had to make something of my life.” And I feel like watching Batman v. Superman would be the worst thing for me right now.
There is a part of me that is afraid that Batman v. Superman could make my depression worse: There is a part of me that is afraid that Batman v. Superman could drive me to consider killing myself.
I know that must sound ludicrous. I’m thinking it’s ludicrous, now that I wrote that thought down.
But when superheroes, who are supposed to inspire me and pick me up when I’m feeling down, wonder What’s the point? I start to wonder What’s the point? too. And then my mind goes to dark places.
I’m sticking with movies like Kiki’s Delivery Service. Movies that teach me This isn’t the end.
I’m not going to kill myself.